Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Schools Out

This is the first week that school has been out and I am just waiting to hear the kids tell me that they are bored. It has been nice to slow the pace down and especially nice not to have to get up early and get out the door. Judith (Hal's mom) has been here for two weeks and has been keeping the girls busy while I nap or go here and there for appointments. Thanks Judith. My mom arrives next week and will stay less than a week and then we are off to Minnesota to visit the Schierts clan. Isabella, I cannot wait to see your new purple room.
Sorry my blog entries become fewer and fewer but it does take energy for me, energy I am very much so lacking. Last weeks visit to the doctor was good. She says I look much better and I have gained a couple of pounds (thanks to DQ blizzards). I am scheduled for PET and CT scans for June 6th to see if the chemo is doing what it is supposed to be doing.. zapping the cancer. Please please pray that the cancer has shrunk and that the chemo is working.
Last week's treatment left me wiped out. I have been sleeping much better and seem to not be able to get enough even though I get9-10 hours a night and naps daily. Routine chores leave me tired and I have to sit down quite a bit as standing for long periods leave me a bit dizzy.
Even having conversations leave me exhausted so if you call me and I am not chatty, please do not take offense as it is the evil chemo poison which circulates throughout my body. Those closest to me have realized when Ann is feeling good she makes her round of phone calls to check on everyone.
Today, I decided I was ready for hair to start growing back, ready for the treatments to end, I am ready for life to be filled with energy, love, laughter, and long conversations but then I remembered that those are the things I want and that whatever I or anyone else is to learn from me, from this illness, has not yet been achieved. God only knows what lies ahead for me and it is His plan for now. I thought the other day how I am either praising God by telling him thank you for this or that or I am asking for His mercy to help me get through another day. It made me smile because then I thought, it's nice to talk to Him everyday. I didn't do that before, I was too busy. Another Deep Thought by Ann.
Anyhow, another kick cancer butt day tomorrow and again next Thursday. Keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

My Pink Can

What an emotional week it has been for the Schierts family. Grace graduated from preschool on Friday. Her ceremony took place after mass where they wore their cap and gowns and received their diplomas. Afterwards the graduates put on a musical extravaganza and then presented me with a gift. Not only was I surprised but BLOWN AWAY at what they gave me. Those little people (all four classes) made me a can. The can is adorned in pink fabric with beautiful pom poms and a beautiful butterfly sits on top. As if the can wasn't enough, those sweet little preschoolers along with the Sacred Heart community were raising money for the Schierts family for the past few months. They had bake sales, garage sales and took donations. On the day of graduation, each one of the preschoolers approached me with a wad of bills and stuffed them into the can. The smiles on their faces told me the story of how proud they were of themselves for helping Grace's mom, for having Jesus in their heart, and for being part of something that really made them feel good. What a day it was. Thank you seems like such a small gesture to you Ms.Megan, Ms.Michelle, you are such beautiful women who give your heart and soul to our children and teach them more than just their letters and colors but about love. To Leigh Ann for opening your heart and garage and spending so much time on the garage sale. To all those anonymous people who made donations to the can, thank you thank you. Zoe's first grade class teachers and parent's were just as sneaky it seems. I just got back from visiting their class and they presented me with more generosity. It seems they have contributed to my house cleaning fund which will pay for the rest of the summer. Thank you to everyone who contributed to this. Our friend Penny and Denice have so graciously come to our home and cleaned from top to bottom. It has been such a God send for us as it takes so much energy for me to do much around the house.
You all have blessed us with such love, compassion ,and generosity. I have learned so much about the power of prayer and how it can make not only me stronger, but our entire community.
Thank you Mrs Gardner and Jes for being two of the finest people I know. I have learned more from you then you know and my daughter is a better person because of your love of your job and the example that you lead. We love you so much! Tears tears and more tears of gratefulness!!!!!!

I am doing well this week and enjoyed my week off from chemo. The Police concert was so much fun! Thank you Erin and Mark for inviting us. Sarah and I had a day of shopping and lunch. I think the best part of that was the lunch. We just sat and talked. something we haven't done in months either because there are children running around or I am just too tired.
Today I went back in for an echo on my heart. The unofficial word is that it looks much much much better. Way to go prayer warriors!
Wednesday is the beginning of the next round of chemo. Bring it on I say!!!!!!!!

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Happy Mother's Day

This has been one of the longest Springs I can remember since I've lived in KC. It's 60 and sunny today, a bit chilly with the wind but we have had a great Mothers Day thus far. It started out with a massage from the whole family followed by breakfast. Since then we have just enjoyed looking at old pictures and relaxing on the back deck watching the girls swing. Oh, it's so nice that they can finally pump their legs and not require a push every ten seconds.
My second month of six treatments came and went this past Thursday. Thanks and love to Amy and Deb who escorted me the last two weeks. As usual, I was able to get caught up on what was going on in their lives and actually listen to what they were saying. I have been keeping up with the acupuncture and now go the day before chemo. I have been thinking that my days following chemo have gotten easier because of the acupuncture and while that may be true, I know the real reason is because of the tremendous amount of prayers that are being said for me.
My shoulder pain has improved significantly as well and I am sleeping better. If it wasn't for this cancer thing I'd say I was healthy!!!!! It is amazing how we take our health for granted.
Many of us who are struggling with an illness tend to see it as a strong clarifier. It clarifies the importance of life, family, a beautiful day, or the way your daughter says Happy Muders Day.
Don't let it get to the point of an illness or some other suffering for you to take the time to thank God for everything.
This week I am off from chemo and plan on enjoying it by seeing the Police concert with some great friends and by watching Gracie graduate from preschool on Friday. Lots of tears for sure!!!
Dr. Fabian had made mention that we would do more scans after two months of treatment so I guess that will occur in the coming weeks. Keep those prayers coming and ask that the cancer is responding! I love you all and wish all of you mothers a glorious day.