Monday, November 15, 2010

Balance or balancing act...

Peace be with you all.

I have a free moment and thought that I should update the blog -- it amazes me that we're soon to be 4 months past Ann's death. I must say that every day Zoe, Grace and I and so many of you too miss her in so many ways.

Yes. There are moments of joy in our struggles too -- Grace has had her 8th birthday with much pageantry and fanfare. She has also received her 1st reconciliation this past weekend and was happy as she is one step closer to her 1st Communion.

Fall sports are over -- Zoe's volleyball team took 2nd place in an end of year tournament and Grace finished up soccer. I must admit that I am relieved of some of the burden and busyness of practices and games. Often with the girls needing to be in two places at the same time, I am thankful for many of you that were so generous to help.

Mostly, these past months have been all about the daily school / work activities that test our virtue of perseverance. I remain in search of a new employment opportunity as the expectation still is that the office I work at will be moved to Denver.

I feel we are still in survival mode on most days and am pleased that no one has gone hungry, dirty, or unloved. We trust God to care for us and as long as we keep our focus on Him rather than the trivial, self made, expectations we give ourselves to carry the day is good.

I took the opportunity to attend a talk on Saturday put on by the Apostles of the Interior Life where the speaker's meditation was on "Balance". She reminded me of how backwards our culture has it when it comes to creating that holy balance in our lives. My typical approach in the past has been to give a slice of time and talent to a lengthy list of to-do's and expectations -- a balancing act; I covered all the bases but not with the holy care they deserved. The reality was that many of those items really were of my own creation and not God's will for me. Nothing that was evil or bad per se just busyness. Sister Elena reminded us that we need to be properly ordered first for God then for relationships with others and ourselves. Way down the priority list would be the acquiring and care of material things. How strange this approach is in our world. How liberating to not chase after things that will not pass with us to heaven.

I am guilty of many years of not seeing God's beauty in His creation - including the creation of His people. I tell you that I have witnessed many beautiful sights in nature this fall, but I am really enjoying this new ability to enjoy each of you that I meet and interact with daily. Of course, this seems easiest to see in my daughters -- how beautiful, how wonderfully made! It amazes me how many times we can be awe struck by an impressive sunset -- do we find the same awe in a friend, a family member or perhaps a stranger? Mother Teresa would call this finding Jesus in disguise of others. I endeavor each moment to soak in the beauty God has put in this world in the others that I meet.

I pray for you that you too see this beauty and can work on balance.
God Bless
Hal