Thursday, May 13, 2010

The rain here just keeps a coming which is nice because everything is so green and beautiful if you can see through the downpours! Much like life I suppose. Amongst the midst of trials still lies so much good to be thankful for. My weekend with the girls was so much fun. The tea party taught us proper manners and I think the girls both know how to place their pinkie out when sipping tea or in their case lemonade. I was awoken by Grace holding a huge cup of coffee in her hands on Mother's Day morning. She even had the right amount of cream in it!
My second round of increased chemo was to begin yesterday but i was sent home because my platelet count was too low. Platelets help your blood clot and since I am on blood thinners as well, it just didn't seem like my body had fully recovered from the last round of chemo so we will try again on Monday. My tumour marker test was not back yet and my doctor would like to do one more increased round of chemo and then do more scans to see if the increased dose is doing anything. Also we will be able to determine if the high doses of estrogen is doing it's job of preventing the cells from forming in the first place. So for those of you who are tracking all of this I will do chemo on May 17th and 24th then have my scans on June 4th and meet back up with my doctor for results and the next plan. Meanwhile i am fairing pretty well. The secret is to keep busy. School gets out in two weeks and I think I am ready. We have plans for most of June and are hoping to get some visits in to Minnesota and Colorado. As usual, it's all day by day around here. God's way of letting me know that I need not get too ahead of myself and to slow down and listen to what his plans are. He and I are back on track and he has been talking non stop. Of course he talks and acts through all of you. Much love and admiration to my friend Lori P. She also is going through treatment and has a devout faith and peace an aura around her. We talked the last couple of days and she brought me such comfort and self assurance. Thank you Lori!
I can do all things in him who strengthens me. Philippians 4: 13

Friday, May 7, 2010

You are my friends. (John 15:14)

You are my friends and I have felt you all so much lately physically, mentally, and spiritually. Not that I ever doubted for a minute that you were not there but when you sometimes exclude yourself from the world it can get lonely. My fault entirely, needed and necessary.
Today's gospel along with the last few days have brought me back to life and what is needed to get done. Seeing friends and getting caught up in what is going on in their lives and not having the attention solely on how I am feeling is really nice. Directing a good day that I have been given and redirecting it on to someone else who is in need is such a good feeling too. No wonder all of you give so much and no wonder that's all God asks of us. love one another as I love you. No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. To my Este girls in Jax, I missed you last week so much. Thank you for the serenade. To Terry in Salt lake for always calling at the right time. To my posse here in our Shawnee bubble for always calling, stopping by, and even sneaking into my bedroom and leaving me notes when I am out cold! Thank you all for listening to the Holy spirit and letting him guide you on your days! To Hal, Happy Birthday. Thank you God for bringing him into this world (and thanks to his mom for having a part in it too)
My first cranked up dose of my chemo cocktail was two weeks ago Friday. I was down about three or so days afterwards and back at a lower dose the next week. The second dose was very tolerable and I had a great weekend and then had a day on the couch and then back to life. I forget how crazy we can make our lives and how time really doesn't move as slow as I once thought perhaps watching the clock can do that. Anyhow I am off from cancer land this week and have plans with my girls. Tonight will be movie night tomorrow is the great mother/daughter tea, a brownie bridging ceremony and a pajama birthday party to bring the day to close. Mothers Day will be spent listening to Zoe Rae sing the psalm in church and a soccer game from the G ster. God is good!
This I command you: love one another.” Now go out and do it!